always the laughing singing dancing puppet
doing all the motions
inside quiet alone scared lonely.
I despise the inside. there is no way out.
join me in the inside of you dare. none do.
why? why me? why not me? am I too gruesome to be believed? only to be seen outside, laughing singing dancing?
am I not vulnerable, too secure, not dependant, not a suckling? why should I have to be?
I don't get it. what is the formula, what is the answer? why can't I figure it out? I'm not stupid, but why don't I understand?
what am I waiting for? why do I have to wait? have I missed it? is it ever even going to come?
as the day grows ever later with each passing second minute hour day week month year, I fear, it will not.
locked inside, quiet alone scared lonely and unhappy...