shitty sleep

my mind was pulled in too many directions, thinking about my life stretched thin between what I want, need can and can't do. it's frustrating and disappointing to have so many aspirations so far out of reach. they say just do it, take the risk. I don't know if I can. failure is not the fear. it's the consequence of failure.

I could try to ensure more success in my endeavors, but that would almost eliminate my distractions. and I love them. to a fault it appears though. where the fuck is the balance?

side note before I go, using my phone for this and tapping on it sounds weird. like, tapping a plane of glass in my hand. I need a new phone before the screen falls full on out of this one...

more nonsense later. stay with me...